philrancid (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
philrancid) wrote2003-08-31 12:58 am
philrancid) wrote2003-08-31 12:58 am
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I figure I'll just put another post in, since I seem to be just kind of burbling along, a babbling brook of cluttered brain-cess dribbling out of the choked sluiceways that I wear at the ends of my hands.
I got to thinking a minute ago, when I typed an accented word, about the existence of things that don't exist.
Zen is bullshit. It is Zen, isn't it? The one where like things stop being real until you experience them or something? Well. If you guys stop existing every time I go out of sensory bounds, then how is it I can come back to the bathroom and still smell the lingering love of my family's air biscuits?
I know I'm a crazy little bitch, but Why In The Fuck would I use my universal power thingymabobs to create the stink of a fart? Some sort of kharmic debt to some long-departed E. coli that I mistreated in a past life?
And what about when I type an italics code, but leave a blank spot at the end. Why is it no one yells at me for my poor typing skills, italicizing something you can't even see , no matter how badly it needs it?
Now, I can tell you are all thinking that the space I left up there in that last sentence was italicized--
WRONG. That little bitch was bolded. And the two spaces between this sentence and the last aren't even really spaces--they're God's navel lint.
Uph! I've gone and done it now, brought God into it.
I know some of you are a little offended by the thought that a God would even exist, let alone go around getting mentioned, but the plain fact of the matter is that Zen is bullshit, cuz otherwise why would you make up some idiot in another part of the world saying the word God jsut to upset you, just so you can fart and I'd not even be there to smell it?
What is it? Solipsism? That thing we're talking about?
You know, even if you did make me up, for some stupid reason, I wouldn't play along--I'm a dick like that.
Those philosophical chestnuts always got on my fucking nerves, you know that?
If a tree falls in the forest and no one is a round, does it make a sound?
You're goddamned tooting. That tree gets up and says, "Goddammit, who put that there? I swear to God, nobody fuckig picks--
You get the drift right?
S'pose you fucking think yer smart now, eh?
Well then; did you catch those two italicized spaces I put around the word "that"?
Don't fucking lie--I didn't even put any spaces around that fucking "that". Oh? You can see them, huh? You just Think you see them. It's that thing where you expect something to be there, and then it isn't but you see it there anyway, because you're expecting it so hard.
I told you I wouldn't follow the script, but NOOOoooooo, you had to go and make me up anyway, dintcha, ya silly fuck?
All right: If you had to be crazy to make up the universe you experience, and some of the shit in it, like people who give head with their retainers still in, then how the fuck do crazy people come about? Is that how some of us actually make it to "normal"? We got made up by the tired backbrain of some crazy motherfucker wearing a white canvas hug?
And how in the hell would a crazy guy who can't even cross the room on the dark parts of the tiles make up a guy with erectile dysfuction who thinks he's a gay chinchilla? It's all shit, I tell ya, although of course shit is the defining defeating stroke to that argument.
You know, those smart-ass professors that tell you if you put a cat in a box it stops existing. Well if there ain't some litter in that damn box not existing right alongside that cat, you gonna find out real fucking quick what ain't existing--wake up and smell that stinky pussy.
(sorry--just couldn't resist)
For those of you who are Creationists, you know, "God spoke and BANG it happened".. who the fuck was He talking to?
And for all of you out there who think there ain't a God: I suppose you honestly believe that somewhere in the back of your mind you made up Quantum physics and mechaincs, and then all of a sudden you didn't know what the fuck it was or how it worked.
Although that does proivide a certain kind of logic, if you think about it while out for a drive in the big city.
I got to thinking a minute ago, when I typed an accented word, about the existence of things that don't exist.
Zen is bullshit. It is Zen, isn't it? The one where like things stop being real until you experience them or something? Well. If you guys stop existing every time I go out of sensory bounds, then how is it I can come back to the bathroom and still smell the lingering love of my family's air biscuits?
I know I'm a crazy little bitch, but Why In The Fuck would I use my universal power thingymabobs to create the stink of a fart? Some sort of kharmic debt to some long-departed E. coli that I mistreated in a past life?
And what about when I type an italics code, but leave a blank spot at the end. Why is it no one yells at me for my poor typing skills, italicizing something you can't even see , no matter how badly it needs it?
Now, I can tell you are all thinking that the space I left up there in that last sentence was italicized--
WRONG. That little bitch was bolded. And the two spaces between this sentence and the last aren't even really spaces--they're God's navel lint.
Uph! I've gone and done it now, brought God into it.
I know some of you are a little offended by the thought that a God would even exist, let alone go around getting mentioned, but the plain fact of the matter is that Zen is bullshit, cuz otherwise why would you make up some idiot in another part of the world saying the word God jsut to upset you, just so you can fart and I'd not even be there to smell it?
What is it? Solipsism? That thing we're talking about?
You know, even if you did make me up, for some stupid reason, I wouldn't play along--I'm a dick like that.
Those philosophical chestnuts always got on my fucking nerves, you know that?
If a tree falls in the forest and no one is a round, does it make a sound?
You're goddamned tooting. That tree gets up and says, "Goddammit, who put that there? I swear to God, nobody fuckig picks--
You get the drift right?
S'pose you fucking think yer smart now, eh?
Well then; did you catch those two italicized spaces I put around the word "that"?
Don't fucking lie--I didn't even put any spaces around that fucking "that". Oh? You can see them, huh? You just Think you see them. It's that thing where you expect something to be there, and then it isn't but you see it there anyway, because you're expecting it so hard.
I told you I wouldn't follow the script, but NOOOoooooo, you had to go and make me up anyway, dintcha, ya silly fuck?
All right: If you had to be crazy to make up the universe you experience, and some of the shit in it, like people who give head with their retainers still in, then how the fuck do crazy people come about? Is that how some of us actually make it to "normal"? We got made up by the tired backbrain of some crazy motherfucker wearing a white canvas hug?
And how in the hell would a crazy guy who can't even cross the room on the dark parts of the tiles make up a guy with erectile dysfuction who thinks he's a gay chinchilla? It's all shit, I tell ya, although of course shit is the defining defeating stroke to that argument.
You know, those smart-ass professors that tell you if you put a cat in a box it stops existing. Well if there ain't some litter in that damn box not existing right alongside that cat, you gonna find out real fucking quick what ain't existing--wake up and smell that stinky pussy.
(sorry--just couldn't resist)
For those of you who are Creationists, you know, "God spoke and BANG it happened".. who the fuck was He talking to?
And for all of you out there who think there ain't a God: I suppose you honestly believe that somewhere in the back of your mind you made up Quantum physics and mechaincs, and then all of a sudden you didn't know what the fuck it was or how it worked.
Although that does proivide a certain kind of logic, if you think about it while out for a drive in the big city.